A terra-spin through 400 years of East Midtown oddness
“I am still not clear how I got here. There are no turtles. There is no bay.” – author Kurt Vonnegut on the East Midtown block where he lived for 40 years
Turtle Bay is much more than fancy apartments, tiny dogs and tinier-tipping diplomats. This neighborhood, nestled between Lexington Avenue’s Grand Central Terminal and the East River’s United Nations, is so (quietly) weird that it makes Twin Peaks, WA, look like an equally fictional Mayberry, NC.
Here’s licensed tour guide, TB local, longtime New York Times museums-and-old-bars contributor and overall media monster, Bill Schulz’s, version of a trailer…
This is the address where Nathan Hale regretted he had but one life to give, right before being hung as our first (albeit wholly ineffective) Revolutionary War spy.
John and Jackie Kennedy honeymooned here, Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward’s marriage began here while Joe DiMaggio and Marilyn Monroe’s union ended here. All while Andy Warhol’s first Factory appalled uptight locals.
Within this zip code, Bernie Madoff’s billion-dollar Ponzi scheme was hatched, John Lennon’s “lost weekend” was dispatched, while writers-in-residence: Truman Capote, Stephen Sondheim and E.B. White’s plot points were attached.
Katherine Hepburn, Elizabeth Taylor, Frank Sinatra, Senator Robert F. Kennedy, President Dwight D. Eisenhower, Greta Garbo, General Douglas MacArthur and Johnny Carson called Turtle Bay home, (mostly on, or off, 49th street), Buddy Holly, Richard Harris, along with Elizabeth Taylor, tippled within these storied taverns, (mostly at the 140-year-old PJ Clarke’s), while John Gotti murdered here (mostly at Sparks Steakhouse).
Tour Highlights Include:
- Your “Why is East Midtown called Turtle Bay?” queries…(is it an English bastardization of the Dutch word deutal, meaning “bent blade”, per this harbor’s knife-like shape, a main source of cuisine for resident Lenape tribes or an ode to four, Manhattan-based, teenage reptiles, named after Italian Renaissance artists, who fell into nuclear ooze and became ninjas/mutants?)…will all be answered.
- The story behind why a manic mob destroyed an entire block, between 45th and 46th Streets, sparking the infamous draft riots of 1863.
- A mid-19th-century-built stable and dairy that currently hosts a club devoted to experimenting with all manner of mind-altering psychedelics.
- A certain subway grate that hosted a certain upskirt shot of a certain Hollywood icon.
- Salacious Secret Service stories, (every President, within the last two centuries, has had a hotel stay within Turtle Bay).
- Ladies of the evening and the UN diplomats that love them, (i.e. why this area is quietly a hooker haven of Manhattan).
- The home of a legendary, female journalist who was the first to detail Nazi atrocities whilst also calling out Charles Lindbergh as, less a hero, and more a dirty Hitler apologist.
- The strange saga of New York Jets Hall-of-Famer, Joe Namath’s, attempt to own a sensationally sleazy singles bar following his 1969 Super Bowl win.
- Insane anecdotes regarding famous tenants within The Waldorf Astoria.
The Tour
The tour lasts 2 hours and covers about a mile. It begins outside the neighborhood notable, PJ Clarke’s, (915 Third Avenue, between at E 55th St). The tour ends near Grand Central Terminal.
Rates
$40
Please contact us to set up a private tour!
Duration
2 hours
Ages
This tour is best suited for ages 16+
Tour Guide
Bill Schulz is a longtime print/broadcast journalist who recently acquired his NYC tour guide license and firmly believes in the following, paraphrased, Mark Twain quote: “walk what you know”. Your humble host has lived, loved and liquored in Turtle Bay for over twenty years and his super-weird, personal anecdotes are available upon request.
Read more about Bill.